The best Christmas in 14 years!

Dec 30, 2018 at 11:36 AM

It was way too long. 

Over a decade since I had last seen my son. 

The fault was mainly mine. 

In his later, teenage wild out years, I couldn’t and didn’t want to risk my out spoken, take no shit, quick to throw a snap back to anyone that dares to make a disrespectful under the breath comment about his lifestyle. 

He proudly defends his crown of me labeling him the gayest man on earth. 

So for him to come to visit me at Canaan, one of the most violent penitentiaries in America, wasn’t a good idea for a number of different reasons at that time. 

Our weekly phone calls would have to do. 

Christmas 2018 happened to fall on a Tuesday this year, when I get my visits here at MDC Brooklyn where I’m still waiting to hear the outcome of my appeal. 

My son, along with his sister Nia and my mother were coming to visit. 

In our recent phone conversations, I asked him not to get too emotional with the tears. 

Drew of course, sticking to his true form, denied my request. 
“I’m just a very emotional person and I won’t be able to hold it back,” said with a flamboyancy I had no choice but to accept. 

Walking through the visiting room door, a surprised lump caught my throat as I laid eyes on my son, looking like he stepped off the cover of the GQ magazine. 

While he kept his cool, it was I that was struggling to hold back the flood of tears as we embraced and I gave my son a kiss. 

The time flew by and after another strong hug and kiss goodbye, I gave the same to my mother and daughter, then doubled back for a third hug and kiss, thanking Drew for this incredible gift to end the year with.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Temecula Bookwoms Interview

img_8391CLICK TO LISTEN:. Temecula Bookworms Interview

Feb 18, 2018 at 1:22 PM

I want to thank Temecula Bookworms for reading “Voice for the Silent Fathers”. With every new reader, I feel like I’ve made a new friend and I hope the feeling is the same.

1. In your book, you identify disassociation as your coping mechanism before coming to acceptance. What created the shift?

My disassociation or my detachment ended when I came to the point when I was really doing my own personal evaluation of who I am. When the suicide situation came into play, knowing that homosexual teens have the highest suicide rate, my son’s sexuality meant nothing to me. All I wanted was for him to live. I didn’t have the answers to how I would deal with his gayness, but death is final, you can’t come back from that.

2. Once you decided to accept your sons’ lifestyle how did you move towards a relationship with him and what was his initial response?

There were always small steps throughout the years. One that stands out is when I asked him if he was gay and he said “No” because he knew that’s the answer I wanted to hear, fearing my response if he told me the truth. I told him I would love him if he was but he didn’t believe that, and why should he when I mishandled other situation in the past. But when I wrote him the letters explaining I always knew he was gay and accepted him, his initial response was a little too much for me, with wanting to tell me about his boyfriends and talking to me like a friend instead of his father. I explained that to him and he respects that. We have boundaries that continue to grow more and more still.

3. What made your move successful for you?

The fact that there was nothing wrong with accepting my son. Once I chose to accept the truth of what is, there was a weight lifted off my shoulders.

4. In your book, you visit the concept of accepting relationships between parents and their gay children and the lessons you have learned the hard way. What are some of the primary lessons you have learned and how can a parent avoid those pitfalls?

I’ve learned to not judge what I don’t understand. All that stress, hurt, and feeling of disappointment were all my self-inflicted wounds because of my closed-mindedness. There’s no perfect way to avoid the pitfalls, that’s parenting. Your child knowing that their sexuality isn’t a determining factor in the relationship is the key to success.

5. As a father of a gay man, when you were targeted by your friends how did that play itself out in your life?

When my friends would joke about the possibility of my son being gay, I gave the macho gangster responses like “I’d kill him” or “I’d disown him” but he was just a kid. My friends have supported me. I’ve been congratulated for having the courage to admit I have a gay son, which is sad when you think about it.

6. How can fathers of gay men better support their sons and defend the relationships they have with their gay sons?

By making sure their sons know they have their love and support first. But then I’m still finding that I take steps to show it by asking about his current boyfriend and discussing different aspects of having a healthy relationship. Once when I called him, his boyfriend was there and I asked to speak with him. That meant a lot to my son and for his boyfriend at that time. So it’s not only saying you accept them but taking the actions to show your support.

7. A lot of people think that being Gay is a choice. What’s you’re feeling about that?

I don’t think it’s a choice. That’s like me saying, one day I choose to be heterosexual. I’ve always been straight and my son has always been gay.

8. What can we do as mothers to be more supportive of gay sons and their relationships with their fathers?

Force the fathers to read my book! But really, mothers might have to be the ones that explain to their sons that it’s the fathers who really have the problem. One reader told me that my son raised me, and on some level…he did.

9. What do you say to people who think being gay and living a gay lifestyle is sinful and we should not be accepting?

There was a time not to long ago when marriage of a different race was considered a sin and slavery wasn’t, all authorized using the bible. My God is one of unconditional love. I’ve experienced hell when I wouldn’t accept my son. I think calling the gay lifestyle “sinful” is a cop-out for those that fear change and refuse to evolve. It’s the easy way out of dealing with the reality that love knows no race or gender. Love is love.

10. Tell us about your next book series.

The Evolution of a Gangster Turned Guru is just what it sounds like. My spiritual journey of finding my true self, building a relationship with God and helping others to do that same.

Www.voiceforthesilentfathers.com

#voiceforthesilentfathers

Www.gangstertoguru.com

#gangsterturnedgurupresents

Chattin’ it up with Ms. Jamie Timmons

jai-and-eddie

I was very excited to be asked for a follow-up interview with Ms. Jamie Timmons, Author and Owner of Matters of My Heart, an emotional support program for adult survivors of domestic violence and/or sexual assault.

This interview, more like a discussion between friends talks about Jamie’ thoughts on Voice for the Silent Fathers and how it’s impacted her life personally.  We also touch on my upcoming Gangster Turned Guru Presents series.

Grab a cup of coffee, sit back for the next 30 minutes and listen in.  Don’t forget to leave a comment and let me know what you think. “Chat It Up…”

Thank you,

Eddie K. Wright

#voiceforthesilentfathers

#gangsterturnedguru

#eddiekwright

#jaitheauthor

#mattersoftheheart

AVAILABLE NOW: Gangster Turned Guru Presents:

“A Day in the Life with Coffee and Paradise”

I am currently an inmate in a Federal Prison serving my 12th year of a 45-year sentence!  If I can find peace and happiness in this type of environment… How is it that people in the ‘free’ world can’t? What is it that I know or what woke me up? I’ve been asked these questions thousands of times and now, following a conversation I had with an inmate, who’s asked these and more,  I’m ready to share my thoughts on what I’ve learned with YOU!

This E-Book is available exclusively for Kindle at Amazon.com for .99. (FREE July 27 – 31, 2016)

I look forward to sharing my insights with you!

#gangsterturnedguru

#voiceforthesilentfathers

Open letter to the father I used to be!

Referenced Article:  Father Reportedly Refused To Claim Orlando Shooting Victim’s Body Because He Was Gay.

From: WRIGHT, EDDIE

Jun 26, 2016, 1:06 PM

When I first sat down to write this post, right after reading this article about a father who refused to claim his son’s body after he was killed in the Orlando Massacre at club Pulse, my outrage, anger, and disgust for this father who was causing more hurt and pain to his son’s family and friends was clear in my explicit word expression because…..I was mad as hell.

My blood was boiling as visions of a young mans body, alone in the morgue just waiting for his loved one’s to put him to rest flashed in my minds eye. I was livid and had to step away from what I was writing when I noticed how upset it made me.

I went and got a fresh cup of coffee, collected my thoughts, took a few deep breath as I read over what I originally wrote and then I started over.

I already know that plenty of people are going to post comments expressing their outrage at this fathers actions and more of the same from me wouldn’t help. So by the time I finished my coffee and calmed down, returning to my spiritual center, I realized this is one of those fathers I posted about a few weeks ago who won’t get the chance to heal the relationship with his child.

So now from my Gangster turned Guru perspective, I began to feel sad for this father, and all fathers who couldn’t overcome their own prejudices and fears by learning to love unconditionally. I’m sure this fathers son would rather I use this opportunity to again encourage father’s to reach out to their children and work on healing their relationships. If ever there was a time to offer your parental comfort it’s NOW.

I’ve been the master of bad choices and decisions as a parent, and with my life in general, I can admit and accept that. But when I got over my self-righteous, egotistical, know it all way of thinking, swallowed my macho man pride by letting my son know that I love him unconditionally, weather he’s gay, straight, transgender or what ever… A great peace, joy and happiness was felt within my soul.

I realized that with all my imperfections as a father, my son never stopped loving me even when I didn’t make it easy to be loved.

Each time I send out a post expressing the importance of our parental love, acceptance and support, I do it with the specific intent of reaching that father I used to be. Confused, alone, struggling with accepting what I couldn’t understand and didn’t want to understand. But what I did want was to have the courage to be the type of loving father I promised to be when I first held my son, looking into his eyes, silently letting him know that he could always depend on me. I broke that promise plenty of times, but life gave me another opportunity to live up to it and I try my hardest even in my complex situation.

I’m really trying my hardest now to come up with the right words to write that will wake up these fathers that are actually hurting inside, especially with a heart so cold that it allows a father to leave his child’s body unclaimed. No he doesn’t need another person to scold him for his actions, what he needs is a hug because he’s hurting and suffering from a broken heart.

I speak as a father that went through it and it’s going to eat him from within until he’s healed. It’s harder to do that now that he’s son has moved on but I’m sure that’s what his son would want. There are always opportunities to make amends, the first step is to stop causing more hurt and pain. I said it before and will probably say it a thousand times, making peace with my son by giving him my unconditional loving support to live his life in which ever way makes him happy was one of the best things I could do as a father. I hope others parents have the courage to do the same.

Eddie K. Wright aka Gangster turned Guru.

A father killed his son because he was gay!

crimescene-tape

On Friday, Shehada Khalil Issa,69, of North Hills was charged with fatally shooting his son, Amir Issa 29, outside the family’s home earlier this week because he was gay, according to the Los Angeles district attorney’s office.

Reading that a father killed his 29-year-old son because he was gay immediately caused strong mixed emotions to surge through my body. The politically correct statement would be condemning the father for such a senseless act.  Killing his son just because he’s gay… Who would ever think…. Hold up… I’d be a hypocrite to act like I never said “I’d kill my son if he was gay” and I know I’m not alone. That’s an all too common response when I tell other fathers my son is gay. “Eddie, you’re a better man than me because I would kill my son…” Although the intentions are never really there to the point where the statement is taken seriously, after reading about this tragic situation, it shines yet another spot light on how serious it is.

About a month ago I felt the urge to write something to post after reading about the trial of Elliot Morales, who taunted Mark Carson and his partner Danny Robinson, saying “What are you, gay wrestlers?” before fatally shooting Mark Carson in the face on a Greenwich Village street.  I didn’t want people to start thinking, now that I’m releasing a book addressing this issue my intent was to be some new advocate for the LGBTQ community.  I’ve written a number of manuscripts intending to debut them as spiritual self-help books branding “Gangster turned Guru”, not expecting to come out as “Gangster turned fight for the rights of the gay community spokes man.”  And I’m not that… but I would be because first and foremost I’m a concerned father, and the thing is every time I read or hear about the unprovoked violence, specifically against gay men, reoccurring fears for my own sons safety pulls at my heart. Especially with Drew’s “Accept me as I am and if you don’t well fuck you!” attitude. I’m proud that he’s always had the courage to express who he is.  It’s the ignorance of other’s and how they’ll react that terrifies me, and one of the reasons why I chose “Voice for the Silent Fathers” to be my first release. Shehada Khalil Issa, the father who couldn’t overcome his own fears and prejudices, will now have to live with the choice of murdering his son Amir Issa for the rest of his life.

Supporting parents, specifically fathers of children in the LGBTQ community allows them to let down their macho man egotistical mindset, to come and find peace with acceptance of their loved one. I’m the first to admit I’ve made a lot of mistakes as a father, but I’ve had the opportunity to ask forgiveness for the hurt and pain I’ve caused my son in order for our relationship to heal. Reading about what this father did makes me reflect on how blessed I am to have such a wonderful meaningful relationship with Drew.  It’s something that I cherish.

Now there’s going to be plenty of people that will stand in support of this father that murdered his child just because he was gay.  Pats on his back, nods of respect from those claiming they would do the same thing and that groups not exclusive to men.  I’m naturally inclined to give women the benefit of being more enlightened, but all of them aren’t.  Shehada Issa might not show any remorse now, but there will come a time when those happy memories of his son Amir begin to haunt him, especially since Amir’s not coming back.

So for those who aren’t in contact with their children, parents, or friends just because they live a lifestyle that you may not particularly agree with, take a moment to be honest with yourself in asking if you have the courage to swallow your pride by not basing your relationship according to one’s sexual preference or identity, but instead on who that person truly is.

The bottom line is… We all share the one common denominator uniting us all… LIFE, from an all-inclusive, unconditional loving God.  Let me reiterate that… From an ALL INCLUSIVE, UNCONDITIONAL LOVING GOD!!  Allow that to be the foundation to build upon when it comes to your relationships.

~Eddie K Wright, Gangster to Guru!!

Article reference:

Los Angeles father accused of killing his son with a shotgun because he is gay:  http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/la-father-accused-killing-son-gay-article-1.2586050

Murder suspect gets to torment hate crime victim in court:

http://nypost.com/2016/02/23/homophobic-killer-says-gay-man-had-the-bullet-coming-to-him/

#VoiceForTheSilentFathers

The Book Cover!

VOICE FOR THE SILENT FATHERS BOOK LARGE