As heard on www.worldtunedradio.com
This young Haitian guy Stevie, but calling himself Hyena, came back to the unit after spending 40 days in the hole.
He’s 21 years old but when I tell you he looks like he’s 12, I mean it. He’s shorter than my 13 year old daughter and weighs about 100 pound soaking wet. If we were free in the world together, I’d take him right to my Princesses middle school to beat up all the little boys that want to be her boyfriend.
Hold up, that was the over protective father, triggering my past gangster mentality taking over.
Anyway, Hyena lost his mother in the earthquake that devastated Haiti and came to live with his uncle in Brooklyn. It didn’t take long for the lure of the streets to take hold and he’s since found himself as a member of the Cripps.
Charged with armed robbery, the Feds offered him 10 years on a plea deal.
He came to my cell, asking me for advice.
“Eddie, ten years is like life,” he said with his strong Haitian creo accent.
“That’s how it seems now, but your young, you’ll be all right. Take that!”
“You say that like it’s nothing because you have over 13 years in already.”
“No” I corrected, “I say it like it’s a good deal and if you think about going to trial, they’ll knock your head off with twenty years or more.”
“Well, I’ll go to trial and they’ll have to give me that!” He said.
I’ve heard this argument many times before and I recognize it as the fear talking.
I also understand that he’s looking towards me for advice because he’s scared for his life.
“Hyena, your running around on gang time. You just got out the hole and your chasing the next high smoking all that K-2.”
“I been a Crip before I came to the Feds and I’m Cripping until that day I die. I get high all day cause there’s nothing else to do.”
“There’s plenty to do. Your not making the choices to do it.” I said continuing, “You have to want better for yourself and that means you’ll have to do change.”
“Change for what? They want to give me 10 years!!” He said leaning forward in the chair, running his hands through his mini-afro.
“First of all, if you start changing now, you won’t loose your good time and you’ll be home in like eight years.”
“Listen, this is what comes with the lifestyle your choosing, so get used to it. You want to be a gangster, bust your gun, wave your flag while throwing your little hand signs, then be prepare to do more time after that because you’ll either be killed or come back to prison, those are the consequences.”
“I want like two or three years,” he said like he didn’t hear what I just told him.
“That’s easy to say but the way your thinking and the actions your taking in here are attracting a different result. Take that little bitty 10 years, hopefully it will be enough time for you to wake up and live your true potential.”
Standing up, offering his hand, shaking his head he said, “Man, you say take 10 years like it’s nothing. I can’t hear that right now.”
“You don’t want to hear it, but I speak the truth to the youth!” I said as he turned and walked out my cell.
As much as I would like to grab Hyena, sit him back in the chair and talk to him until he’s ready to change, I know that he has to want better for himself first.
He has no idea that the patterns of thoughts he’s entertaining are setting the laws of attraction in motion to draw his experiences.
He’s convinced himself that he’s a Crip in his mind and speaks without understanding that our words have the power to become the results of what’s spoken. Hyena can’t see the logical conclusions of the path he’s currently on and when I was his age, neither could I.
I try to discourage those headed on that path, but in the mist of doing time, it’s a difficult barrier to conquer.
Instead of focusing on how much time I’ve done or have to do, I pay attention to what I’ve accomplished and my future goals.
Right before we locked in that night, I passed Hyena my “Day in the life with coffee and Paradise” book.
He gave it back this morning, having finished it since it’s only 30 pages.
“Does life really work like that?” he asked.
“That’s a question you should be able to answer if your honest with yourself. Think back to how you were thinking in the past and what lead to where you are now.”
“I like the way you break all that down with the laws and principals. Do you have something else to read?”
And so it begins.
There hasn’t been a day of this year where I didn’t have the urge to shoot off my opinion about the ramification and the underlying meaning of what President Trump brings to the table. At first, I was disappointed, especially in my current position as a federal inmate. The momentum of the prison reforms in an attempt to correct draconian mandatory minimums laws that were put in effect back in the 80’s came to a sudden halt. Although I wasn’t a Hillary supporter since it was Bill Clinton’s administration and Joe Biden’s articulate drafting of the mandatory minimum laws that continue to disrupt communities across America, they did attempt to right the wrongs of the past with the Fair Sentencing Act (the name in itself reveals just how unfair it was) by supporting the Obama’s administration’s criminal justice reforms. That was really my only issue as far as who won the Presidency.
Once Bernie Sanders, who was my preferred candidate, got cheated, I knew the fix was in. That fix happened on both sides, so who could really be mad? I’m actually glad that Trump is our president, and when I said this to my mother in the visiting room triggering the rage that’s been eating her from within since the November results, her eyes got watery, and her face turned red with a volcanic fury, gripping my arms, digging her nails into my flesh intending to draw the blood of her only son. Glaring her squinting blue eyes, slowly shaking her head through clenched teeth she said, “How dare you say that to me!”
My mother was a hippy, who’s been marching for civil rights since the sixties so she lives and dies for that love, peace, and happiness movement. She’s a white woman who in 1969 married my father, a big strong bald headed black man when interracial marriage was still ILLEGAL in some southern states of America. Just because interracial marriage was legal in New York, it didn’t stop a local racist from attempting to burn a cross in my parents’ front lawn.
That was one of the proudest stories she told me about my father, catching the ignorant fool in the act and my dad beating the shit out of him.
My mother raised two black children on her own in an all white community, suffering her share of racist insults like being called a nigger lover. Derogating stares, humiliating whispers behind her back but loud enough for her to hear, while walking by with my three year old sister, holding her hand and cradling me, a new born on her opposite shoulder keeping her head held high, ignoring the hurtful taunts, that in those days people felt way too comfortable expressing.
The strength and fortitude my mother displayed to change the world that my sister and I grew up in was always evident. Taking us to marches protesting nuclear facilities, demonstrating for women’s rights, painting our faces with flowers and peace signs to spend out childhood Saturdays, walking with thousands of people for whatever cause my mother felt needed to be addressed, was normal for my sister and I growing up.
Jean Wright was grooming me to be the first black President, after a revelation she had when she took me to the 20 year anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s march on Washington.
Although she loves President Obama to the point that she’s probably on some governments watch list of those willing to martyr themselves for his cause, she resents him just a little for taking my spot. But it wasn’t Obama’s fault, I was a rebellious confused teenager that took to the streets.
When I explain to my mother the politics of living in the Penitentiary, between the different races, gangs, and religious groups, most of the time I’m able to equate the same or similar issues to the outside world. When I’ve shared certain situations where I’ve had to intervene by resolving a peaceful solution, she’s proud that I’m finally channeling mementos of the political ambitions from her vision she had while standing with me bare foot, knee high in the Washington memorial reflection pool.
For me to support Trump in any manner was a betrayal, the kiss of Judas in my mother’s eyes. As she released her imprinting nails in order for me to explain why I would make such a cruel statement, I asked her to breathe and calm down while I explained my train of thought.
President Donald Trump has removed the veil that a big portion of this country has hidden behind for years. Now that he’s so boldly put out there what many of us have known, but couldn’t prove without sounding like a conspiracy theorist or bitter fools, is the reason I’m glad he’s president.
Trump exposed how easily people can be manipulated and controlled by ignorance, fear, and anger. There was no doubt in his display of insolence for women, blatant racist remarks and overtly prejudice policies, that he planned to implement once he was in the office he now occupies.
President Donald Trump is not the problem and he’s defiantly not the solution. He represents a time of a not so distant past that he camouflaged in his campaign slogan “Make America Great Again.” Donald Trump is nothing more than a reference point, an indicating marker of the type of character that appeals to enough voters to get him elected. That in and of itself reveals a lot more to me than anything he can say or do and that’s why I’m glad he’s President. The power is in the people and like it or not, the people have spoken!!
But now my dear reader, what are the people saying? Eight months in and it’s scandal after scandal, some are just distractions from what’s really going on of course. Look how close we came to losing the Affordable care act, and more importantly look who saved it, Republican Senator John McCain.
Quick side note: Why is it that we have Universal health care for prisoners but can’t figure a way to provide it for every other American? Better yet, why is it always the lack of money which seems to be the excuse for not saving peoples lives but there is an unlimited about spent on bombs and weapons of war to kill people? But let me get back to this topic.
I’ve hesitated on writing politically because so many people are already doing it and I’ve somewhat detached myself to try to stay focused on the bigger picture with my spiritual perspective with all things. When I said to my mother, “God must have wanted Trump to be president”, I saw that her faith and belief in an all loving God begin to falter, and that’s the last thing the Gangster Turned Guru intended to do and what inspired me to write this piece.
Currently, there are protests over Confederate statues, some for them and some against them. Donald Trump made it perfectly clear where he stands on the issue. Who’s surprised? I’m not. It’s comical when the argument is made that the Confederacy is part of our history, which is true, but a statue or a confederate flag is honoring that history.
Why is it that Germany doesn’t have statues of Hitler in state parks or streets and colleges named after him? Is Adolf Hitler not part of Germany’s history? Why is it that there is only one African American museum dedicated to the history of slavery, yet there are over 50 museums dedicated to the Holocaust that didn’t even take place in America, well the Jewish holocaust didn’t but the American Indian holocaust did and I’m not even sure what the number of holocaust museums dedicated to that atrocity is, if any at all. What about that history? The Confederate flag, statues and all that the Confederacy represents is a silent acknowledgment and honoring of an institution of oppression which still exist, although it’s cleverly veiled from most.
Many thought that the institution of oppression was gone once Barrack Obama got elected, but those that are really conscious couldn’t be lulled back to sleep so easily, but enough of us were.
It’s still a shock to some that Donald Trump is the president, but his presidency is not a mystery to me. This experience of Trumpism is necessary for our countries unfoldment in representing who we are. The spirit of one’s character is revealed in one’s personality. The protesters marching, CEO’s resigning from Trump’s cabinets and Republican Senators speaking out against their own party all reflect a unifying indication of morals and principals that this concept of America is supposed to represent.
We are one nation under God and the collective consciousness of our Nation will attract the experience to match the predominant mental attitude of our ideas.
To think that an eight year Obama administration would wipe clean the slate of the effects and consequences over two hundred years of institutionalized oppression has caused, is idiotic.
So when I told my unconditional loving mother that I was glad Trump is president, it’s not because I believe in any of his policies or the character he’s displayed, it’s that he continues to inadvertently reveal the core mental attitude of an overwhelming portion of this country.
Unlike my mother, I’m able to maintain my peace of mind with Donald Trump being President, mainly because I never lose sight of the fact that we come from One God who’s ultimately in control and allowed Trump to be President for a reason.
Listen, I’m the first to admit that I’ve disagreed with the way God has done things a number of times in my life, but looking back from who I was to who I am now, I’m able to recognize the infinite Source of life was always in control.
President Trump is the ultimate wake up call, for those that have eyes to see and ears to hear.
We each have a personal responsibility to respond accordingly. By maintaining positive, peaceful, constructive thoughts we’ll attract the experience that reflects our inner mental attitude.
God is good, which means there is always more good than bad in people. Not only in Donald Trump because he is just one man, but also the abundance of good in the ones he represents. There is always a silent power behind all things that attract the results of our thoughts and ideas. So, if our dominate inner attitude is to be at peace, more harmonious with all people, not just Democrats or Republicans, but with humanity as a whole, reflecting that helpful, joyful nature, then by the year 2020, we should be cheering “Michelle Obama for President!!”
Eddie K. Wright, AKA The Gangster Turned Guru.
The writing process of my memoir “Voice for the Silent Fathers” was emotionally therapeutic, making the book a personal success by helping to heal the relationship between me and my son. The readers’ comments have been and continue to be very inspirational and I’m thankful for them all.
I have a few copies of “Voice for the Silent Fathers” circulating through the prison and a list of names of those next in line waiting to read it. Who would think that a book about a father’s struggle to accept his homosexual son would be competing with all the urban hood novels so popular in the penitentiary?
Having people I don’t really know mention certain intimate parts of my life or thoughts I’ve had that at one time I never expected to share took some getting used to. Everyone has a story of a sibling, nephew or uncle in their life that’s gay and after reading “Voice for the Silent Fathers” they were able to relate with many of my struggles and came to the same conclusion of what loving unconditionally really means.
Another rewarding gift which makes the book a success, are the conversations it stirs that has lead to the launching of The Voice for the Silent Fathers Talk Radio Show which will launch later this fall. Not everyone holds the same point of view on topics but a healthy discussion is better than staying silent. Various issues that are challenging society today will be explored. (Subscribe to the channel here: blogtalkradio.com/voiceforthesilentfathers)
In 2017, my publisher, The M Wright Group will be releasing “THE EVOLUTION OF A GANGSTER TURNED GURU” from the Gangster Turned Guru series, detailing my transformation upon discovering God’s unconditional love, the Universal laws, and the self-empowerment of consciously creating our experiences.
At a time when I thought my life was over, I was awakened to the truth and realized that my life had just begun. This insightful memoir is a journey of moral growth, ethical guidance and the spiritual enlightenment of a Gangster Turned Guru.
I was very excited to be asked for a follow-up interview with Ms. Jamie Timmons, Author and Owner of Matters of My Heart, an emotional support program for adult survivors of domestic violence and/or sexual assault.
This interview, more like a discussion between friends talks about Jamie’ thoughts on Voice for the Silent Fathers and how it’s impacted her life personally. We also touch on my upcoming Gangster Turned Guru Presents series.
Grab a cup of coffee, sit back for the next 30 minutes and listen in. Don’t forget to leave a comment and let me know what you think. “Chat It Up…”
Eddie K. Wright
It’s all about how we think, how we respond and how we learn!